The DMV Blues – Episode 2

The following is the screenplay for a new sitcom I asked ChatGPT to write in the style of a 90’s sitcom. It came up with “The DMV Blues”…

Episode 2

Title: DMV Blues: The Waiting Game

FADE IN:

INT. DMV – DAY

We see Frank, Tiffany, Jessica, and the old man sitting in the DMV waiting area. They are all looking miserable and bored, waiting for their numbers to be called. Frank is looking at Tiffany seductively, while the old man is flirting with both Tiffany and Jessica, sipping on a flask of whiskey.

OLD MAN: (to Tiffany) “You know, back in my day, we didn’t have to wait in lines like this. We knew how to get things done.”

TIFFANY: (awkwardly laughing) “Uh, yeah, I’m sure things were different back then.”

Jessica, meanwhile, is getting increasingly agitated and anxious.

JESSICA: (to herself) “This is taking forever. I can’t take it anymore.”

She looks around the room and sees some shady characters.

JESSICA: (to herself) “Maybe I can make this more interesting.”

She gets up and walks over to a seedy-looking guy, whispering something in his ear. He nods and hands her a small baggie.

JESSICA: (to herself, excitedly) “This will make things much more bearable.”

She takes out a small amount of heroin and injects it into her arm.

JESSICA: (to herself) “Oh yeah, this is what I needed.”

As she sits back down, Frank notices something different about her.

FRANK: (concerned) “Jessica, are you okay?”

JESSICA: (smiling) “I’m better than okay. This waiting game just got a whole lot better.”

Tiffany and the old man exchange disapproving glances, but Frank seems intrigued.

FRANK: (to Jessica) “Can I try some?”

JESSICA: (handing him the baggie) “Of course, anything to make the time go by faster.”

Meanwhile, the old man is making crude jokes and comments to Tiffany and Jessica.

OLD MAN: (to Tiffany) “I remember when I used to have a girl like you, with legs that went all the way up to here.”

He gestures towards his groin, causing Tiffany to recoil in disgust.

TIFFANY: (angrily) “Excuse me, but I am not your type.”

The old man just chuckles and takes another sip from his flask.

As they continue to wait, the group starts to make fun of all the short people in line.

FRANK: (laughing) “Look at all the little people. It’s like we’re in a midget convention or something.”

Tiffany and Jessica join in on the laughter, but the old man just shakes his head disapprovingly.

OLD MAN: (disgusted) “You young people have no respect for anyone or anything.”

The group continues to joke and laugh as the hours drag on, until finally, their numbers are called.

As they leave the DMV, Jessica gets into her car and drives off, weaving dangerously on the road.

FRANK: (to Tiffany and the old man) “Looks like she drives better after doing heroin.”

TIFFANY: (shocked) “What? That’s not funny.”

OLD MAN: (smirking) “I don’t know, I think it’s hilarious.”

The group continues to banter and joke as they walk off into the sunset, leaving the DMV and its waiting game behind them.

FADE OUT.